My job is hard, crazy, rewarding, looney, stressful, draining, disturbing, irritating, taxing, productive, gratifying, productive, beserk, wacky, touching, life-changing, and so much more.
I've seen some heart-wretching things lately. Babies having to be coded and not being able to save them after doing everything we could. A toddler being crushed by a car and having serious injuries out of our care. Watching a family say goodbye to their father who had the WORST, massive brain bleed and no hope of survival. Missed delivering a baby in the ER by a few seconds. Watching a mother silently cry over the body of her tiny baby. A family start to understand that their lives are no longer the same after saying goodbye to their mother. Sometimes its hard to go back out there.
I often for get how taxing my job is until it manifests itself in other areas on my life. Like waking up in a panic after watching my nephew fall 8ft and not get up or not sleeping much at all. Losing my patience quickly with stupid people, not showing compassion when I know I have it in me.
However, despite this I love it. Its unbelievable in many ways. But rewarding in so many others. I see people at their worst and when they are most vunerable. So yes, I have been yelled at and called many names--hence the shell--but I have also given hugs, handed out tissues, and said I'm sorry this happened to you. I've helped miserable little kids smile when they don't feel good. Lets face it everyone love me when I come in with the good pain medication. I've done things no one else could.
My co-workers make it worth while. I admire these people so much--they are a support and strength in and out of work. They put up with me when I cry, laugh, be grumpy, go completely crazy, and am at my wits end. Overall I'm glad to have a job that allows me to make a difference one way or the other.
I've seen some heart-wretching things lately. Babies having to be coded and not being able to save them after doing everything we could. A toddler being crushed by a car and having serious injuries out of our care. Watching a family say goodbye to their father who had the WORST, massive brain bleed and no hope of survival. Missed delivering a baby in the ER by a few seconds. Watching a mother silently cry over the body of her tiny baby. A family start to understand that their lives are no longer the same after saying goodbye to their mother. Sometimes its hard to go back out there.
I often for get how taxing my job is until it manifests itself in other areas on my life. Like waking up in a panic after watching my nephew fall 8ft and not get up or not sleeping much at all. Losing my patience quickly with stupid people, not showing compassion when I know I have it in me.
However, despite this I love it. Its unbelievable in many ways. But rewarding in so many others. I see people at their worst and when they are most vunerable. So yes, I have been yelled at and called many names--hence the shell--but I have also given hugs, handed out tissues, and said I'm sorry this happened to you. I've helped miserable little kids smile when they don't feel good. Lets face it everyone love me when I come in with the good pain medication. I've done things no one else could.
My co-workers make it worth while. I admire these people so much--they are a support and strength in and out of work. They put up with me when I cry, laugh, be grumpy, go completely crazy, and am at my wits end. Overall I'm glad to have a job that allows me to make a difference one way or the other.
thanks for this post melmer..good to know someone else feels the same things i feel. you rock.
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