Overwhelmed

To a degree I realize I am a control freak. I don't know why. One day maybe I'll sit down and try to figure out how it came about. I hate psychology. So lets face it that may never happen. I do know at least one problem with being a control freak. I know there are multiple. But like I said I hate psychology and don't want to analyze them all. This one problem you ask? It's easy to get overwhelmed. I like lists--shocking I know. I like to be able to sit down, write everything I need to do, then imagine the perfect to get it done. What's funny, my plans never work out how they should. New tasks come up. I underestimate the amount of sleep I need. Things take longer than they should. I just get overwhelmed. Nothing new. And in all reality I'm not as busy as half the people I know. I have half of their responsibilities. So I just suck it up and somehow try to get it all done. The last few weeks have been just like that. The control freak within me has taken over dying to get it all done. Not only done. But done in the way I think it should be. One day, I doubt it, but one day I hope to find the balance between passion and practicality. To avoid the nervous break downs and go back to the basics. This is nothing new. I've been this way forever. But was is new is realizing how many people actually care. They care when I get to my breaking point. They care enough to listen to me rant, hug me when I need it, and wipe the tears away. I have so many people who care its amazing. Sometimes I simply need a reminder of it. Hahaha cause as much as control freaks want it. Nothing is really under control.